After taking both texts into account, I strongly believe that Text Two does a more impressive job at giving an account of someone who survives life-threatening situations as compared to Text One. Hence, I choose Text Two.
Firstly, Juanita Watson adds short sentences for a more dramatic effect. These short sentences make her already heart-gripping story even more breath-taking and shocking. This can be noted in the following examples: “And it’s especially great to be alive” and “I suddenly found myself falling. Sixty feet”. Instead of composing it into one, long sentence, the writer breaks it down with exaggeration; therefore, grasping the reader’s attention.
Second of all, Watson gives an account of her feelings at the time of her “adventure”. She narrates about the trauma she almost fell into and the wounds that adorned her body, but how she was sensible enough to take action despite these obstacles. For example, “The odds were stacked against me. But I didn’t let my mind focus too much on that”. The writer describes how she aided to her own wounds and nursed her broken hip. She pushed the thought of death away, prayed and kept going.
I did not choose Text One for the reason that it lacked detail. Sally Williams overlooked several essential details including an account of how she personally felt regarding the life-threatening circumstances. Her story was nerve-wrecking and cringe-worthy; however, she failed to deliver it in an appropriate and suitable manner. One might observe this in the following example: “Koepcke didn’t have any tools for survival such as a machete or plastic boots”. Williams is at a loss when it comes to emotions, hence unable to connect with her readers. As if that was not enough, that statement (along with many others in the passage) were mundane and flat. Where were the expressions? Where was the emotional appeal? The writer truly has a long way to go before she can actually get her readers hooked.
Compared to Text Two, I think Text One does a better job at achieving its purpose, that is, to inform the reader about the feelings of a person moving to a foreign country. To make his point clear, the author describes Allen’s feelings using words and phrases like “a source of wonder for Allen”, “bizarre” and “excitement”. This intends to give the reader a clear idea about the character’s mix of emotion.
The author has used imagery to tell about the changes. Without any direct comparison, the writer tells about the differences, for example, “so smooth, no potholes, no wild bends”. He even writes about how London is quieter, compared to Ethiopia, especially using the words, “Can you hear the nothing, Father?” This makes the reader realize the change in the environment better. The writer also addresses the character’s sense of smell−“to the strange smell of English breakfast”−which help the reader understand how different things are.
Text Two, on the other hand, is in first person and gives an impression of being “rescued” rather than “moving”. The author does not understand the language that is being spoken, but rather comments on people’s attitude towards her, for example, “generosity” and “gratitude”. Except for in the first paragraph, the author fails to tell us about the new place or city.
Both Text One and Text Two do an excellent job of presenting information regarding the difficulties and hardships encountered while moving to a different country, but I personally felt that Text Two was more superior and successful in it’s portrayal of the topic. Text One and Text Two are both book extracts.Text One was written by Benjamin Zephaniah, while Text Two was written by Kim Thuy.
The purpose of both texts is to inform and they have a general audience.However, Text One is tailored to suit a wide range of audiences, while Text Two has a more sophisticated audience. Although the language used in Text One is simple,clear and easy to understand, I prefer Text Two. Text Two has a more mature perspective and uses vivid imagery to enhance it’s appeal. There are also well-chosen adjectives e.g.”A landscape so white, so pure”,”short-sleeved orange pullover” which allow the reader to create a clear image in their mind.
Text Two is more interesting and amusing and is able to effectively grasp the reader’s attention making it overall more enjoyable to read. Text One lacks this quality and hence it appears more dull and fails to maintain the reader’s interest.
Text One contains a majority of short sentences and short paragraphs. This makes the writing seem more simple and childish e.g.”but there were no people”,”Alem watched television” etc. Text Two allows the reader to relate to the author and feel more attached to the text. The long sentences and relatively longer paragraphs enhance logos significantly.
Text One comparatively contains much less figures of speech than Text Two. Text Two is therefore much more alluring e.g.”like a mother duck” Text Two is made much more beautiful and enchanting.
Text One although reader-friendly has a major flaw-it lacks vivid and crisp descriptions. It is simple and this simplicity does not appeal to me as much as Text Two. Text One and Text Two have an informal tone and both relate personal experiences. Text Two is more successful as it effectively presents the hardships in a more graceful manner.
Another reason why I prefer Text Two is because of its wonderful vocabulary that is very impactful and entrances the reader immediately. I also feel that Text Two contains more information and essential details. It is extremely well-written in my opinion. Text One lacks these redeeming qualities which make it very inferior in comparison.