Section B: Q. A school or college website has asked for contributions called ‘Working Part-time When Studying’. By Hamza Kamil

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‘Commentary: Diary by Simon Dixey’ by Mayam Iraj

‘The Three Woman: Edgon Heath’ by Roha Khan

EYEWITNESS ACCOUNT My plans for this class By Zahra Sajjid

Date:Tuesday, 7th February 1950

To:Principal Henry

From:Alice,9B

Address:London,oxford school

This is to state that what our new teacher ‘Mr Braithwait’ did in class today.He taught two of my classmates ‘Ms.Dare’ and ‘Mr.Potter’ a lesson.

We all were gossiping as he entered the class and started introducing himself.He told us that he is our new teacher and all of us must be attentive and listen to him silently without interrupting.He began speaking about his business that he is here to teach us and to treat us as adults

As he was giving his ‘beautiful’ speech Ms. Dare came rushing through the door.She did not realize how late she was.I looked at Mr.Braithwait’s face.He seemed angry.He spoke reluctantly that there are two ways in which a person may enter a room:one in a controlled manner,the other is as if someone had just planted a heavy foot on your backside.He then said that Ms.Dare has shown us the first way.Ms.Dare stood up with a humiliated face,went out,came in very silently.

I know the addressee must be getting interested I would like to now state how Mr.Potter was taught a lesson.

It all started when Mr.Braithwait told us that ladies will be addressed as ‘Miss’ and the men will be addressed by their surnames.Potter stood up angrily and said that whats the need of calling them ‘Miss’ we know ’em’.The sir asked him his name.He said confidently “Potter”.The sir then said that I want you to tell me which one of this ladies are unworthy of your courtesies?All the girls stared at them including me and he said embarrassingly “no sir”.I would like to inform the addressee that potter was taught a lesson.

After the two incidents Mr.Braithwait instructed us to conduct properly.First he told us about the girls that we should be worthy and appreciative of the courtesies we men will show them.As for the boys he said a man should look cleaner and tidier.There is nothing wrong with brushed shoes clean face and hands.After some time you guys will think about girlfriends and they would like you to be clean.

He then said that you young men/women should be perfect in cleanliness,department,courtesy and work because the younger children will try to copy you so you should set a good example towards them.

i hope the above account is good enough to be read by the children in our school and they may learn something out of it.

Zimbabwe Grapples With Hypertension / What’s Money ? (Comparative question) By Asfand Mohiudin

To begin with, the passage “What’s money ? ” is taken from the novel “Dombey and son” that is written by Charles Dickens and the passage “Zimbabwe Grappes with Hypertension” is a news report , the writers name is not stated in this passage . The first passage is about a young boy who asks his father about the importance of money and why money has so much value while the second passage is a report that describes the problems of Zimbabwe and their locals due to the chaos caused by hyperinflation. The themes of both the passages is about money and the genre of the first passage is realistic fiction while it is non fiction for the second one as it is a news report about the current ,ongoing events in Zimbabwe. The main purpose for the first passage is to entertain as it is a story and to inform for the second one. The audience for both the passages is a general audience as the texts can be understood easily.
Firstly, both the passages begin with a sentence that tells the audience about what the content of the passage is going is going to be about – “Papa! what’s money ?” from the first paragraph and “Zimbabwe grappling with hyperinflation ” from the second passage.Both these sentences are about money even though the first one is a question and the second one is a direct statement. There is no use of statistics or factual information in passage one but the second passage has a lot of statistics used – “at around ZW$ 25billion” ,”..more that 80%” , “want 10 million” , “they give you 2.8”. So the second passage is mostly based on facts and information and the first passage is based upon an argument in which just one question keeps on extending -“Papa what’s money?” then “Papa what’s money after all ?” and finally “Papa what can it do?”. These questions intrigue the father and reader alike , it is observed ,the surprise the father has by this sentence -“what is money after all ” and he repeats his sons questions as he is reflecting upon them.

Moreover, the tone is thought provoking and serious for the first passage based upon the questions asked -“Why didn’t money save my mama?” .On the other hand ,the time of the second passage is also serious and semi formal due to its style of writing -“Zimbabwe dollar …legal tender” and “throes of economic crisis” . There was also use of some difficult vocabulary in the first passage- “presumptuous atom … propounded such an inquiry” to compare the young boy to an atom , it was a metaphor used. The second passage doesn’t contain any other figurative language apart from one hyperbole -“people are cannabalizing  each other” to show how the locals of Zimbabwe are treating one other. Furthermore , the first passage does not include a subheading but the second passage has one – “Living with inflation”. After this subheading , there are only quotations that are taken from the witnesses who actually are the locals of Zimbabwe -“hardly look after our families” , “not enough in the bank” , “won’t be able to afford prices” ,”not going to buy much ” . The purpose of these quotations is to make the report authentic There is also repetition of words in both the passages like in passage one -” money” is used six times in the passage whereas the word “worthless” is used to describe the poor conditions of the currency of Zimbabwe .

The first passage concludes itself with a question -” I wonder why it didn’t save my mama”.It tells the about that even though  money can provide you with worldly and luxurious possessions , it won’t provide you with love or bring lives back from the dead. Whereas the second passage doesn’t conclude itself but it gives us information -” many families are unable to afford a square meal” to show how difficult it’s to live in Zimbabwe. The ending is oblivious , nobody knows about the future of Zimbabwe , it is dystopian.

Overall, both the passages have achieved their purpose – the first one to tell the audience that money can’t buy you everything and second one tells us that the residents of Zimbabwe are leading their lives into an uncertain future of economic crisis.

Candidate D: Low Level Exam Script

Candidate D_low level

‘Is online learning as good as face to face learning?’ by Zoraiz Syed

Online learning is basically studying through ‘the power of the internet.’ It is becoming increasingly common in many parts across the globe. Online learning has many advantages but it also has a great deal of disadvantages, as compared to face to face learning.

Firstly, online learning can help educate people in places where educators cannot reach. The teachers may not be able to reach a certain place because of unavailability of roads or no proper infrastructure or even because of threat to life. But these places may have an internet connection which would enable them to achieve their studies online. There is a city called Transylvania in the country of Panem. The governors of this country are very strongly opposed to education and therefore the lives of the educators are threatened here. However, this city has complete access to the internet and the people who want to study can do so through online browsing.

On the other hand, there are some places which have no internet at all. These places make up about 60% of the globe. They are mostly rural areas which are poor and cannot even afford electricity. In these places, face to face learning is the only form of education and it is excelling very well. These ‘rural areas’ have produced tons of successful scientists for example Dr. Ali, Dr. Lin, Dr. Dre and more. These were all a result of face to face learning.

Despite that, online learning is more effective than face to face learning. In online learning, there are deadlines which have to be met at the exact given date or time. If the deadline is not met, the online learning scheduled for a person becomes disrupted. For example, I have to submit an essay on the advantages of online learning by Friday the 13^th. If I do not, I will start to lack behind in my studies as work will start to pile up. Therefore, online learning ensures efficiency and prevents laziness and procrastination,

However, in face to face learning there is less pressure on the students which enables them to work better. In face to face learning, when a teacher gives a task and a deadline, and the student fails to complete it in the given time, the teacher can take certain ‘actions’ to prevent it from happening again. For example the teacher could deduct the marks or scold the pupil or, every students favorite, complain to the parents! This can bring about improvements in the child as he would now work harder and better than before to successfully complete his tasks.

On the contrary, in online learning, there are no scolding’s or punishments of the student. This is a remarkable feature since punishing a student can embarrass him very much and this may have negative effects. The student can become demoralized and will start getting a negative result. This may lead to him getting further punishments up until the point that he is so used to these that it has no effect on him anymore. This can cause him to not care much about studying and start failing. A poll from the University of Sialkot showed that 80% of students who were given punishments during three out of five days of school failed miserably in their final examinations.

Nonetheless, online learning can also be very costly. The cost of face to face learning depends on different things such as the area, type of school and such similar examples. It is suitable for all classes of people. Online learning, however, can  be expensive and some people may not be able to afford it, depriving them of education. An online course of Physics costs about Rs5000 a week! Who would want to pay that kind of money?

In my opinion, online learning can never be as good as face to face learning. Face to face learning helps the student and the teacher interact better which helps in getting better results. It also enables people who are both poor and rich to get the same quality of education. However, the world is modernizing and face to face learning needs to come out of the traditional way and become modern with the world.

‘AO2: Telling Rowdy’ by Rumel Rana

The passage is very emotional. It tells me to what extend some people go for friendship.

The title tells me what the passage is about. For example: ‘Telling Rowdy’. The intended effect tells me that Rowdy is being told about something.

The author is ‘Sherman Alexie’ who is a short story writer. The intended effect relates to Native Americans.

The genre is fiction. For example: ‘I do know that hope for me is like a some mythical creature’. The intended effect makes me read this story from which I will come to know the life style of Indians and Rearden kids.

The theme is friendship. For example: ‘You can still come with me ‘and ‘You’re still my best friend’. The intended effect is pathos.

The content tells that they both are trying to remain friends. For example: ‘You can still come with me’. The intended effect reminds me the love of friendship.

The purpose is entertainment. For example: ‘My heart broke into fourteen pieces’. The intended effect makes the reader feel emotional and curious to read more.

The audience is young adults. For example: ‘Don’t touch me, you idiot!’. The intended effect stimulates emotion.

The style is narrative. For example: ‘You’ll never do it’, ‘You’re too scared’. The intended effect adds color to the story and makes it more intense.

The tone is sorrowful. For example: ‘It was pain, pure pain’. The intended effect induces strong emotion.

The attitude is critical. For example: ‘I have to go. I’m going to die if I don’t leave’. The intended effect is intense and makes reader emotional.

The punctuation is in a great amount. For example: ‘I’m doing it … I’m going to Rearden tomorrow’. The intended effect is to gain attention.

The sentence structure is mostly dialogues. For example: “Rowdy’, I said, ‘I’m as serious as a tumor’. The intended effect creates a clear image of what is happening in the plot.

The paragraphing is mostly short paragraphs. For example: Short paragraph is of one line and long paragraph is of four-six lines. The intended effect is easy to read and understand.

The F.O.S are in variation. For example: Hyperbole: ‘My heart broke into fourteen pieces’. The intended effect is that it creates picture.

The conclusion is pathos and makes me want to read the whole story.

AO3: Mr Tumnus & Interview

I think that the passage ‘Meeting Mr. Tumnus’ is very interesting. Although I was aware of what I was going to read. It was a predictable piece of writing. Where as in the interview of Georgie Hanely and James McAvoy, I learnt many new things about the characters themselves and the differences between the actors and their characters.

The first passage ‘Meeting Mr. Tumnus’ is written by the author CS. Lewis who is a children’s’ author and also a well known classical writer. Whereas the author(s) of the second passage, the ‘Interview of Georgie Hanely and James McAvoy’ the two actors are the authors. Georgie and James are speaking the exact words written down in the form of a dialogue.

The genre of the first passage ‘Meeting Mr. Tumnus’ is a fictional story. An example would be the fact that the passage has the faun which is a creature from ancient Greece era. Contrastingly the second passage ‘Interview; is clearly a real life interview between two actors. For example “Georgie: And you became more faun-ey. More goat-like.
James: My beard got longer”

A very pleasant similarity between the two passages is the theme, which is friendship. Both the ‘Interview’ and ‘Meeting Mr. Tumnus’ have a quite heavy use of emotional appeal on the reader. An example from ‘Meeting Mr Tumnus’ is when Mr. Tumnus the faun breaks down and Lucy comes to support him and make him feel better by saying “I don’t think you’re a bad faun, you’re a very good faun.” And another example from the ‘Interview’ is when James McAvoy espressed how heart warming it was to watch Georgie Hanely grow, “James: I’m starting to. That was my favorite thing, watching you grow. You grew inches during this film.”

The purpose in the first extract ‘Meeting Mr. Tumnus’ is to entertain the reader, and persuade the reader to read further into the novel. An example would be “Are you the daughter of Eve?”  this entertains the reader and makes the reader curious, wanting to read further on. Whereas, in the second extract ‘Interview’, the purpose is to inform the reader about the lives of the actors, getting to know the actors better and getting their perspectives. The reader learns the hardships and difficulties of being an actor while at the same time being able to relate to the everyday lives of the actors. For example, Georgie feels the sorrow of not being around her loved ones and tells the reader “Georgie: Being away from my friends and family.”

The tones of both the extracts are similar in a way that both include friendliness, welcoming vibes, humor and emotional attachment. For example, from ‘Meeting Mr. Tumnus’ the faun, Mr. Tumnus says “Good evening, good evening” giving the reader cheerful, welcoming vibes. And for the ‘Interview’ James and Georgie show what a close bond they share and their experiences together. For example “James: You guys got so much more comfortable by the end.”

The attitude of the passage ‘Meeting Mr. Tumnus’ is welcoming and joyful, spreading good vibes all around. For example, when Mr. Tumnus, the faun invites Lucy to have tea with him. “How would it be if you came and had tea with me?” and another example when Mr. Tumnus is making the tea for both of them “One for me, and one for a friend.” Similarly, the attitude of the ‘Interview’ is also cheerful and cozy. The difference is that in real life, the actor James and Georgie need not act to get along.The bond they share is real, and it is of two very good friends. For example, “Georgie: We got more mature, really. In the earliest shoots I was a bit of a spitfire on set, I was really hyper on set, wasn’t I?” and another example, “James: That was my favorite thing, watching you grow.”

To conclude, one may say the bond the two actors Georgie and James chare is as friendly and strong as the bond they are to show as the characters in the story. It is an overall cheerful state of mind. In the story, they have just met and are on a good start to their friendship whereas in the real interview they are actually the best of friends.

‘Sometimes lies can have serious consequences. Describe a time when a lie had a major consequence for you’ by Zoraiz Syed

“Lies are the new truth,” my friend told me. I was telling him about how I had lied on my resume for a job and had stated that I was an ‘experienced computer engineer.’ Now I had got a call for an interview and did not know what to do. My interview was in an hour so I had called up a friend to give me some advice. I learned a valuable lesson from this: never take advice from your friends! My friend told me to play it cool and just keep lying if I wanted the job. Being a recent university graduate, I was in a tough situation at the time and was in desperate need of a job. So I set out for my interview, which would later lead to a frenzy of lies.

“Take a seat,” the interviewer ordered. I sat down and tried to control my shivering. The interviewer first asked my name, age and all the basics. I did not lie there. She then asked about my previous occupations. I lied there. Further, she asked my experience and where I learned my computing skills from. I lied there too. I must have been a pretty good liar because at the end of the interview, the interviewer seemed pretty impressed. She said she would check up with my previous bosses and then contact me. I was fine by this because, well, I had lied!

By the time I reached home, I summarized what I had said in my interview. According to me, I was a software engineer who had had schooling from MIT. I finished at the top of my class and was immediately recruited by NASA to design a software for one of their space missions. After I got ‘bored’ at NASA, I joined the UN and became a software engineer for them. When my contract with the UN finished, I started working for a private Chinese firm by the name of ‘Apple’ which was owned by a Pakistani millionaire. Now I was looking to explore new options.

Since I had lied about my jobs, I had lied about the contact information too! Therefore, all day long I was receiving calls, asking to talk to the Director of missions at NASA or the head of the UN’s software department and even the CEO of Apple. The day passed with me singing praises about myself and before it was over I had got the call from my interviewer, telling me that I started my new job the following day.

Early morning the next day, I was suited and booted to start my first real job and fourth fantasy job. But when I got to the office, it was a totally different scenario.

I saw all the office management standing outside, including the interviewer. At first, I thought they were all standing there to welcome me. But when I saw the police around, I knew something was wrong. A series of events followed which virtually destroyed my life. First, two cops approached me and handcuffed me. They said I was ‘under arrest for fraud.’ Then my interviewer came up to me and slapped me right across the cheek. It turns out that she was friends with the director of NASA, the head of the UN and even the CEO of Apple. She knew I was lying from the start and just wanted to see how it went.

Now, I am spending twenty years in jail for being an excellent liar. After this incident I never lied again. But then again, I am a known liar….